What are we doing to ourselves? Far worse, what are we doing to our kids?
Reader Brendan Roberts of Brielle, NJ, has two kids, nine and six. The TV ads for the summer animated kids’ movie “Despicable Me 2” — rated PG for “rude humor and mild action” — included what Roberts described as “a catchy tune” by popular rapper Eminem.
He wrote, “So, of course, my nine-year-old wanted to hear the whole song . . . My Lord, check out the lyrics on that one!”
And this is what his nine-year-old, all nine-year-olds, all kids drawn to the kids’ movie “Despicable Me” could experience. The song’s called “Without Me.” Take it, Eminem, a.k.a. Slim Shady:
“Despicable Me” fans might be shocked at the complete lyrics to the Eminem song.
AP
“Despicable Me” fans might be shocked at the complete lyrics to the Eminem song.
“Well, if you want Shady this is what I’ll give ya,
“A little bit of weed mixed with hard liquor . . .
“You waited this long now stop debating, ‘cause I’m back; I’m on the rag and ovulating . . .
“So come on dip, bum on your lips, f- - k that,
“C-m on your lips and some on your t- - s,
“Get ready because this s--t’s about to get heavy . . .”
And then on and on. That’s the chosen song to attract kids to an animated kids’ movie.
From there, kids could quickly link up to Eminem’s version of the “Despicable Me” title music. “Maestro”:
“F- - k an intro, man, let’s go . . .
“Last shot, give it all you got;
“Try to turn me down, b- - - ch, get f- - - ked with a volume knob.
“F- - k all you snobs, hoes, I hope you all rot,
“Two bottles of Lubriderm and a box of condoms, is that all you brought?
“And you wanna a menage a trois, you tw - - s?
“F- - k that, I’d rather turn this club into a barroom brawl . . .
“Like a leech stuck in a vacuum, ya all ain’t nuthin’ but a whole lot of suckin.’.”
And it grows even more vulgar and violent from there.
Yep, this is all promoted to and easily delivered to nine-year-olds. Starts with a catchy tune sung by a popular rapper, then attach it to promos and TV ads for an animated kids’ movie, a 2013 summer release.
Next month’s back-to-school assignment: Three pages, double-spaced, “How I Spent My Summer Vacation.”
* * *
So, if you’re scoring at home, our national news TV networks twice, since February 2011, have expertly reported “Arab Springs” — the removal of despotic, corrupt and oppressive governments by popular, pro-democracy movements — as having occurred in Cairo, Egypt.
Both nice stories, the latest widely reported early last month with the forced exit of Egypt’s Muslim Brotherhood-backed President Morsi. The fact that Morsi, a theocrat, was president told us what the first Egyptian Arab Spring was worth.
But both Cairo-based Arab Spring stories were bogus in that neither pro-democracy season lasted more than one day. And next day retractions never came.
Both Arab Springs were a matter of naive wishful thinking, as if it’s possible that Middle Eastern countries that for centuries have embraced strident Islam are one day going to awaken, as one, to see the light, to find Ben Franklin helping Thomas Jefferson edit the Declaration of Independence.
* * *
To think what was and how it might’ve stayed. But all high-minded, intelligent and entertaining programming, as first seen on the nobly named National Geographic Channel, is trending dead.
Nat Geo’s latest is “Doomsday Castle,” a “reality” show in which a family takes unreachable refuge from the coming return to the Dark Ages — Armageddon — in an isolated castle, deep in the wooded Carolina mountains.
Of course, this castle isn’t so isolated or these folks so unreachable that a legion of TV production folks won’t be able to find them, 24/7.
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